Monday, November 24, 2008

The Best Thanksgiving Ever

Kids get excited about birthdays and Christmas. Kids don't get excited about Thanksgiving.

Well, this year we are going against the grain. A-Man has been studying the first Thanksgiving in his kindergarten class and boy has he taken to it. Last week we started hearing all about the Pilgrims and the Native American Indians.

Thursday night he came home with a very well drawn (colored markers on white paper) picture of a teepee. He presented it to me as directions for building a teepee and said that we would need to have Thanksgiving in a teepee like the Indians did.


Now, you must realize that A-Man comes by his determination honestly ... His Dad and I are both a smidge on the stubborn side. I immediately realized that a simple dismissing of his Thanksgiving plans would not be tolerated. Thankfully, I had fate on my side.

It just so happens my Dad has been involved in a ministry for decades that allowed (for lack of a better term) he and my Mom to construct an 18-foot tall semi-authentic teepee several years ago. A-Man has never seen this teepee since it only comes out for specific events. I was in a position where I would be forced to return a little pay to my parents for the spoiling they have done of my child. The conversation went something like this:

ME: A-Man, Nanna and Grandpa have a teepee just like the Native American Indians lived in. You should call Grandpa and ask him to set up the teepee for Thanksgiving.

A-Man: Okay.

Phone Ringing

Nanna: Hello.

A-Man: Grandpa?

Nanna: No Alex, this is Nanna.

A-Man: Nanna, I need to talk to Grandpa.

Grandpa gets on the phone and Alex proceeds to have a mostly one sided conversation with him that lasted about 20 minutes. Here are some excerpts.

"Grandpa I need to to set up your teepee for Thanksgiving. We're going to have Thanksgiving just like the Indians. You, know Grandpa, the Indians were in this place and the Pilgrims came to the place. The Pilgrims came to the place in a big ship. The ship was called the Mayflower, did you get that Grandpa? The ... May ... Flower. So they had turkey for Thanksgiving in the Indian's teepee, just like were going to do Grandpa. I made some instructions for you. Grandpa, you're going to need 2, maybe 4 ... no, probably 7 sticks and a GIANT piece of paper to build this teepee. We will all dress up like Indians, everybody in my family. All the girls in my family will dress up like Indian girls and all the boys in my family will dress up like Indian boys."

I was in the kitchen cooking dinner while A-Man was having this phone conversation in the living room. He is notorious for hanging up the phone when is is finished talking, no if, ands, buts or goodbyes about it. So when I heard a short silence I assumed he had pushed the red "End Call" button.

Me: A-Man, are you still talking to Grandpa?

A-Man: (with loud frustrated voice) MOMMY, I AM ON THE PHONE!
(yeah, don't know where he ever would have heard that!)

Me: Sorry, just checking.

A-Man: Sorry, Grandpa, I wasn't talking to you, I was talking to your ... your KID. I call her your kid Grandpa, because, well, you are her Daddy.

At this point I am rolling in the floor, about to pee my pants from laughing so hard. It was an absolute riot!

So this Thursday Grandpa is suppose to set up the teepee and we'll be spending part of Thanksgiving in it.

Wednesday will be spent making corn, chocolate cream pie, green bean casserole and headbands (some with yarn braids for the girls) so everyone can dress like an Indian.

Our fun has only continued since the directions for the teepee were drawn out by A-Man. He came home Friday with a recipe for pumpkin pie. They had made it in his class that day.

A-Man's Pumpkin Pie

Mix some pumpkin sauce and some yellow vanilla cream. Put a vanilla wafer on the bottom and a vanilla wafer on the top. One top of all that put some Whooped Topping.
(written in his exact words)

Yesterday we took A-Man to a Pow Wow that just happened to be held at one of the local university campuses. So he got to see real Native American Indians. So the last few days and the days to come have been and will be a great adventure. I would be lying if I told you we weren't enjoying every minute of it. A-Man has brought a heartfelt excitement to Thanksgiving this year. From our family to yours, may you have a Thanksgiving full of blessings!

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Living the life of an Apronista!

So I made my list of things I was accomplishing in life. One of them was aprons. After I stopped by my friends quilt shop (she was having a 20% off sale) I ended up with material for three more aprons. I have no idea what I am going to do with these. But I finished the first one last night. Super cute. I can't wait to finish them all!!! I'll post pictures soon.

In all my apron festivities I headed over to The Apronista only to find a fantabulous apron giveaway! Check it out!

Thursday, November 6, 2008

My Projects

Now that I'm feeling more on top of things lately, I've found lots of things to do. Here is a peek at my list:

1. Reading. I just finished Distant Bells by Diane Noble and I have reserved her book The Butterfly Farm at the library just waiting for them to call and let me know it's ready.
2. Baking. I have a new hot roll/sweet roll recipe I want to try out. Plus, I owe the kids at work Tres Leches and Natchez cookies. I'm also wanting to make a pumpkin cheesecake.
3. Aprons. I bought the stuff to make two aprons and I can't wait to get started.
4. Working out. I've had a craving to work out. I'm thinking about getting some work out DVD's (they still make stuff like that, right?). We'll have to get a new DVD player, because our old one doesn't seem to be compatible with our new t.v.

We'll see how things progress.

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Candy (Bad) Apples

I like to do a little something for the students that work for me on holidays like Valentine's, Halloween, Easter, etc. Last year I made each of them a caramel apple covered in crushed Butterfingers. I know, your mouth is watering, right?

Variety being the spice of life, I needed a new twist on the caramel apples this year. Oreos ... caramel and chocolate go wonderful together. I was proud of my flavor pairing and went on to create my wonderful masterpieces last night.

Except, they weren't so wonderful. The crushed up cookies wouldn't stick to the caramel, and once I forced it on there, they were UGLY. I'm talkin' U-G-L-Y, You Ain't Got No Alibi, Ugly!

So now it is back to square one. Poop!

Thursday, July 24, 2008

A Serious Moment

One the way to preschool this morning my soon-to-be 5 year old said, "Look Mommy, the flag is high again, the soldier isn't hurt anymore."

If it were only that simple son, if only.

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Being an Ozarks Hillbilly has its privileges!

Who would have thunk it? There are people all over the country envious of us stinkin' hillbillies. Apparently, Missouri has the lowest gas prices in the nation. It's just $3.79 down the street.

According to it's a combination of our low gas tax and our close proximity to high oil producing states like OK and TX.

Click here to read the full article.

Hmmm, I wonder if you can sell gas on e-bay?

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Early Christmas Shopping

I can't really explain how my mind works, it just does. Let's just say I was equally inspired by JenGi's post on yet another useful, but obscure product and Stacey's post about her attempt at a tan.

I am always on the lookout for Christmas gifts. Especially gifts for all of the hard to buy for people on my list. Some time ago while in a local farm and home supply store I ran across this product and my mind was flooded with people I was sure could use a can.

I know, it's the perfect gift for so many, even if they don't participate in any butt busting activities! Can't you just see the looks one their faces right now when they unwrap their gift! Even better they have apparel and temporary tattoos!!


Monday, June 2, 2008


Today was my little boy's first day at summer school. His first day in a big kids school. The first time he has physically been this far away from me with someone other than family caring for him. I'm having minor anxiety issues.

Today is the first day of an 8 week selling season that will determine the pace for the next year. The economy stinks, will people still buy? After all, it's the #1 publication of it's kind in the country.
I'm having minor anxiety issues.

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

The Weekend That Was -- Part 2

Saturday morning we had a lovely breakfast of pancakes and bacon. As we were cleaning up one of those dear park rangers strolled through our area. Hubs saw him coming down the hill and requested everyone act normal. We obviously didn't want to draw anymore attention to ourselves than we already had.

After breakfast was cleaned up we headed out for a little fishing. It was a little slow at first and as usual I got my line all tangled up. I'm a trooper though, I was determined to fix it myself (yes, some people refer to this as stubborn), and I did! As a matter of fact I tied all of my own hooks and baited them myself for the rest of the day!! (Okay, if you know me at all, you know there was an ulterior motive to this. I'm trying to show Hubs that if he doesn't take me fishing more often I'll just go by myself.)

We changed locations to have more room for the kids to fish. I am happy to report I caught the first fish of the day! Well sort of ... When Hubs saw I had a fish on he came over to help. He grabbed the net and brought the fish in. I'm not gonna lie, it wasn't the biggest fish I saw on a stringer that day, but I had done pretty well. The kids were super excited and ran over to see. In amongst the brouhaha the fish broke the line and landed on the bank. Being a smart fish it flopped and flopped it's way back into the water and swam away. Me being the smart woman I am and knowing there were A LOT of people around decided not to flail myself at the flopping fish on the bank and end up in the water with it. I was very proud of that split second decision.

Before two long the kids were tired of fishing and we were tired of the kids. We packed up and went to tear down our campsite. As we put everything away we discussed our next camping trip without kids!

After arriving back home we nestled in for a short nap. After reviving ourselves I put a call into my sister who along with her finance were working on flipping a house. They had a lot to do in a short amount of time. My parents were there helping and well, I felt sorry for them so we loaded up and went to help. I spent the evening scrub-brushing floor boards with bleach water so the laminate could be laid next weekend. Eventually we called it a night and went back home.

On Sunday morning we played hooky from church. I went back to help my sister paint the house. I left after about two hours dealing with that pesky migraine. I drove straight home and laid down.

You've heard there is no rest for the weary. Well I think that applied over the weekend. Within what seemed like minutes it was time to go to our small group. Normally we host small group at our house, but on Sunday another family had volunteered to host a bonfire at their place. Needless to say these folks have a perfect place for this type of event. Several acres outside of town, filled with all types of varmints for hunting, plenty of place for the kiddos to explore, and so on.

I'll just tell you that the "bon" really didn't have any "fire"! I don't know what was wrong with their wood, but I'm telling you it would not burn!! I must say I saved the day. I remembered that we had a starter log left from camping in our vehicle. So, we roasted marshmallows over a starter log!

At the end of the evening I started to help clean up. We were gathering the food to take it inside. Mr. Host asked to hand him a paper plate from the other end of the table. There were probably 6 or 7 plates stacked together, laying upside down. These were the nice heavy "Chinet" plates, so you couldn't just grab one off the top. It had to pick up the whole stack and pry one off. No big deal. Standing directly over the plates and trying to hurry, I quickly picked up the stack of plates. When I saw what was underneath I screamed so loud I'm sure people in the next county could hear me! The plates flew across the yard and I jumped, ran, flew, or whatever just about as far away as they landed. Of course, all of our small group members were trying to figure out what all the commotion was for. It was then they stepped over to see the RATTLESNAKE I had found coiled up under the stack of plates!

I couldn't have told you how I would have reacted to that situation, but now I can tell to that there was a little pee that ran down my leg! Keep in mind that all of this happened really fast, so it was within less than minute that everyone (including me) found out it was a real rattlesnake, it was just frozen solid and put there as a joke on me.

Please pray for the rednecks in my small group!

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

The Weekend That Was -- Part 1

I was so looking forward to the weekend. The weather forecast was PERFECT! The first perfect weather we've had around here since last October!!! It was surely going to be the perfect weekend regardless of whatever circumstances happened.

I go the news on Thursday, JenGi and her family would not be able to accompany us on the camping trip. I'm not gonna lie. I was bummed. I had a pity party for me and her both and went on my way.

I left work early Friday to run some errands and pack for our camping trip. Hubs was suppose to have everything laid out but he didn't. (I wore my "My Husband Rocks" t-shirt anyway.) I had all of our supplies gathered and packed in less than an hour.

Then the migraine hit. I took some drugs and waited for Hubs and A-man to get home.

They arrived and we departed. By the time we arrived at the campground the migraine was allowing me to function. Our friends Hobby Horse and Cow Patty (these are cb handes we came up with years ago. In case you are wondering, mine is Peebles, as in Flintstone.) had been there for awhile and were spending some time fishing. We set up our campsite and started a fire. Before long Hobby Horse and Cow Patty were back with their DD, Munchkin.

Munchkin and A-man are about 6 weeks apart in age. They are great friends and play together like little angels. As always, they played well together, but I'm just gonna tell you right now they were little devils. They wouldn't listen to squat and we spent nearly every second of the trip trying to get through their stubborn little heads. It was exhausting.

We were enjoying a nice dinner of roasted dogs and chips. Suddenly, on an evening too beautiful for words in the middle of a state park, we hear a tornado siren going off! A-man panics! "We've all got to go to the bathroom, right now. The bathroom is always the tornado shelter. Let's go. Hurry! Hurry!" With all the tornadoes that have been in this area lately the schools have been practicing their drills daily ... see he'll listen to them, but not to me!

Well, we quickly realized the siren we heard (which did sound exactly like a tornado siren) was to let the trout fishermen in the park know that it was 8:15 p.m. and fishing hours were over. Everyone could begin fishing again at 6:30 a.m. We just hoped they had a better system to letting everyone know it was time to start!

After it was nice and dark we decide to venture down to the "store" and purchase our fishing tags for the next day. We left our campfire completely unattended. We piled 4 adults and two children in a small SUV type vehicle. No seatbelts, we were just going down the hill and around the bend. Just far enough to be too far to walk in the dark.

We made our purchases and headed back. Just as we entered the loop of road our campsite was on flashing light appeared behind us. Seriously?! We were getting pulled over inside a state park, 50 feet from our campsite.

Oh, crap, our fire! No, we could see it, everything was fine, but we were completely guilty of leaving it unattended.

It must be because the kids are not in booster seats OR buckled in!! We're such terrible parents!

Mr. Park Ranger:
"Excuse me sir, I pulled you over because, you have a headlight out.

"Oh, I do? (Leaning up to look over the hood) Which one is it? I really appreciate you letting me know about that." (I was in the back seat deciding this was not the time to remind him I told him that headlight was out a week and a half ago!)

Mr. Park Ranger:
I'll need to see you license and registration. I'm just gonna write you a warning this time. I'll be right back with this.

The "Barney Fife" of Park Rangers went back to his truck for awhile and came back. If he wrote a warning we didn't get a copy of it. It probably just went on our permanent State Park record.

We proceeded back to our campsite (all 50 feet). Before long we decided to call it a night. We were all tucked away in our tent, when what to our wondering eyes should appear, why flashing lights right outside our tent! Seriously, at this point all the other campers had labeled us as trouble. Hubs unzipped the door as we heard a female voice calling out, "Campground Host, is anybody here?"

She was looking for our camping registration tag that was suppose to be on the post at the edge of our campsite, it was in our vehicle instead. She was nice enough to get it out and pin it up for us.

We all slept pretty well. The air was cool, but not too much. Then it happened.


Yep, they do sound the tornado alarm when it's time to start fishing at 6:30 a.m.!!! And they let it cycle through 3 complete times. 'Cause Heaven forbid anyone miss it the first time!!!

If you want to know more about "The Weekend That Was" come back tomorrow. Trust me, it's just as eventful!

Friday, May 16, 2008

The Right Stuff

I didn't want to come to work today. I wanted to stay home and watch the NKOTB concert on The Today Show!

I really think I remember some of the dance routine my middle school cheer squad did to Hangin' Tough!!! I'm sure after practicing in the privacy of my living room (blinds closed) it would have all come back! 5, 6, 7, 8, left, 2, 3, 4, and spin, 7, 8. Pump left, 3, 4, pump right, 7, 8, again, 2, 3, 4 ... Woohoo!

New Kids were the best thing about that period of life. All 11-14 year-old girls need a musical influence to get them through that awkward stage. Whether it be the boy bands of (gasp) 20 years ago or today's poor width ratio of nostrils to eyes of David Archuleta! I can't believe I just found a purpose for that boy. He drives me batty, but that is another post for another day!

In the mean time, I dug up a little NKOTB for you! So pull the blinds or not and bust a move early 90's style!

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

I want to break free ...

So here is my deal. For the last 3+ years I have worked in office space that was basically the attic of 100 year old building. It wasn't a scary attic, there were finished walls and a tile floor. But absolutely NO, NONE, ZILCH natural light. I have to say, although I longed for a window the entire time, I coped very well.

Now, I have an office with two floor-to-ceiling windows. It's fabulous! However, there are a few drawbacks that I never would have expected. 1) My body is having to adjust to the increased levels of D. 2) Distractions. (i.e. I just had to pause from typing to watch a rabbit hopping along the side of the building looking for food.) I didn't expect wildlife. I didn't expect the sudden urges to run to the mall to blow the giftcard I received for Mother's Day. (It came in a Care Bears singing card. My son explained that Care Bears are for girls, he was going to get a My Little Pony card because that's for girls too, but he went with the Care Bears. Can you tell I'm the only girl in the house!)

It boils down to the fact that this window allows me to see the beautiful day I never knew existed and I just want to get out there and enjoy it. Plus I'm borderline ADD and well ... oh, it's the bunny rabbit again ...

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

My Addiction

I have an addiction. There. I've said it. They say admitting it is the first step. Unfortunately no one has ever bothered to share the remaining steps with me.

The building next to mine (as much as I pay for parking, I should own it) is the campus union. The union is home to a coffee shop. I can't get excited about the plain flavored stuff brewed and dumped in a pot. Nope, I need, lattes and frappes with lots of espresso and syrup!

When I need that warm fuzzy feeling it's a Turtle Latte. When I need to chill out it's a Mint Chocolate Frappe (tastes just like a chilled thin mint cookie!). Did I mention this place is right next door?!

I swear they can tell by the look on my face exactly what I want to order. It's pure bliss, sipping one of their caffeine concoctions!! I had a Turtle Latte this morning, can you tell?

My office is moving across campus in a couple of weeks. I ran it on the Gmaps Pedometer and it's like half a mile away! I could ride the campus shuttle, but they stole the drivers right out of the nursing home courtyard -- It takes forever!! I suppose I could re-route my commute to the office to include a Starbucks drive thru. That means I would have to leave earlier. Hmmm, 10 minutes of additional zzzz's or a lovely specialty coffee drink? There you have it! I'm officially between a rock and a hard place!
I have pretty good veins, maybe I could set up a caffeine drip via IV in my new office! I'm gonna run to the store and buy some oranges to practice on ...

Thursday, April 24, 2008

I'm melting ...

No, no one has thrown water on me. STOP! I know you're thinking witch jokes here. I'll have none of it!

Seriously, for at least (although this would be the place I would normally insert an exaggeration, this is not such a thing) 2 weeks my office has be an average of 87 degrees!!! I have left work on the verge of being ill numerous days.

Don't ask when they will turn the A/C on, because they did already! On Monday night or Tuesday morning they pushed the big blue "send-the-cool-air" button. I know this because the hallway is absolutely delightful, air temperature wise anyway -- the decor is quite hideous!

We e-mailed the head haunch-o of maintenance on Tuesday. We got a nice e-mail back saying they are aware of the problem and we should be patient because it takes up to 3 days for the heating/cooling system to switch from winter to summer.

Well, TODAY is day 3! And it's still 87 degrees in my office!!

I've checked the OSHA website. Although there is no direct regulation there are suggestions for indoor air temperatures. I'm thinking I might have a case.

Okay, I'm gonna go to the little girls room and ring out my bra again!

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

My other family

I am so fortunate to have an extended family. The students that work for me at the university are like my children. At times they frustrate me, make me laugh, make me feel old, or make me feel very proud. In return I hope that I can be an example, so they see Christ shine through me.

Now, a little about each of my peeps!

J.W. -- He adds words and phrases to my vocabulary like "wigidty womp!" He will be going to Florence for the summer. I keep teasing him, saying he will find the girl of his dreams and never come back!

J.T. -- She is my prim and proper tom-boy! J.T. is so reserved, quiet and serious. Her work ethic is amazing! On the weekend you will find her tearing it up on the paintball field! I'm telling you this girl is fierce (and not in the Project Runway kind of way). I'm losing her in a couple of weeks to grad school, but I know she will do great things everywhere she goes!

M.M. -- Eeyore, as I fondly call him, is starting to lose his negativism a little at a time. Don't get me wrong, he is a great kid and a hard worker. He would walk to the ends of the earth for his little girlfriend, it's quite sweet (okay, okay, so sometimes it's a little much and I have to throw up in my mouth a little). It's very important to M.M. that he do a good job, no matter the cost.

S.G. -- She is my veteran. I'm always trying to challenge her to come up with her own answers and conquer situations that may arise. She will be getting married in a little over a year. She will leave me then to support her future husband in medical school. They have promised me I can live in their pool house one day!

A.D. -- This girl wears me out! Energy beyond belief! She reminds me of my real-life sister. You can give her all the advice you want, but she has to do it her way just to see if it will work or not. She is the Queen of Independence! I am so very proud of A.D., she will be moving to NYC in a few weeks to work for Tommy Hilfiger as the Children's Division Product Development Intern.

These kids are only in my life for a short season. I can only hope I am able to touch their lives as much as they touch mine.

Monday, February 25, 2008

Laughter is the best medicine!

I believe a good laugh can make just about anything better. Laughter has no language barriers. Laughter can penetrate the deepest sadness, if even for a moment. Okay, enough with the mushy stuff.

Stacey believes it's all about the hair. I believe it's all about ones ability to make fun of one's self. Imagine if our Commander in Chief had a sense of humor. A sense of humor that is at it's best when all hope seems lost. Granted it's probably too late to make a difference now ... but, we can still have a good time.

For some fantastic bi-partisan political satire visit The Capitol Steps.

Thursday, February 21, 2008

Stella wants her groove back!

I've never like winter. I enjoy an occasional snowfall deep enough to sled and launch some snowballs. One a year is good. Sleet, freezing rain, ice ... NOT MY THING. Ugh, I have the winter blues!

It doesn't help in that my DH, who never has to travel for work, has traveled the last two weeks. I'm a strong woman. I can handle it, normally. When you throw a couple of snow days in ... A-Man and I don't do well cooped up like fightin' roosters! In case I had been contemplating doing the SAHM thing (which I know I'm not cut out for) the last to weeks have dashed any hope of that. I need adults (or at least a group of college students who think they are adults), I need sunshine, I need to not turn into a stinkin' popsicle when I walk outstide.

My routine is completely out of whack! I need to break out of captivity and do something wild and crazy! Maybe get a tat. Nah, that would hurt. Probably something crazy with my hair. Hmm, that takes time and money, something I've had neither of lately.

Maybe I need a good book. I've been wanting to read "How full is your bucket?" I feel like I'm living a Calgon commerical!

K, I'm done whining now.

Monday, February 11, 2008

What are you getting for V-Day?

I've always felt Valentine's Day created a tremendous amount of pressure on parents (toiling over the creative boxes for school) and lovers (the girls care too much and the guys don't care enough).

This year is different.

I know what I'm giving. "Dale: The Movie" 6 disc collectors edition. I pretty stinkin' sure, while we were first dating, Hubs loved Dale Earnhardt more than me. He's never really been the same man since that fatal wreck.

I know what I'm getting. I picked it out. I know, I know, it's cheating. But not this time. I found this site called From Me Tees. I really wanted a "My Husband Rocks" tee. Hubs was genuinely embarrassed, but I assured him I really felt that way about him. It was a great connecting moment for us.


The fantastic news is, we can all have a chance to treat ourselves over at Chased by Children!

So head on over there is a giveaway every day this week!

Friday, January 18, 2008

Medical Advice from a 4 year old

A-man asked me why my voice sounded funny.

I explained to him that my throat hurt really bad. Knowing that he worries a lot, I continued to share that I had been to the doctor and I have medicine to take and I would be better soon.

His response:

"Well, Mommy, if your throat hurts you should swallow some Band-aids." After a long pause. "But, Mommy, DON'T tell Daddy you swallowed Band-aids!"

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Ode to Jen/Gi

Back in her wild-child days we knew her as Gigi. Technically, she'll always be a wild-child but in a good way -- not the way her old blog Girl Gone Wild would lead one to believe.

In 2008, my dear friend (and yours, too) turned a page in her book of life and started a brand new blog. Jen's very own 867-5309.

But what would we call her? Jen/Gi. A good mix of the past and the present.

So, in honor of a wonderful friend and her song inspired blog, I wrote "Ode to Jen/Gi."

Shall we all sing it together?

To the tune of 'Bingo':

There was a blogger, had a friend and JenGi is her name-o.
And JenGi is her name-o.

Okay, here's the deal is always said by JenGi is her name-o.
And JenGi is her name-o.

Foreign lands were once her home and JenGi is her name-o.
And JenGi is her name-o.

She has a dog who poos in her purse and JenGi is her name-o.
And JenGi is her name-o.

Heyhoo is her favorite word and JenGi is her name-o.
And JenGi is her name-o.

A crazy gal, loved by all and JenGi is her name-o.
And JenGi is her name-o.

Love ya JenGi!
And a shout out to Stacey for encouraging me to post this (she could tell I really wanted to)!

Thursday, January 3, 2008

Look Mom! No Cavities!

It was dental week for our family, you know, just starting the year out right. A-man went yesterday and had his appliance (correcting his under bite) removed. It goes back in three weeks from now. Right now it's on the way to a lab where it will be adjusted to put pressure on different teeth. A-man told us last night he wanted it back in, because he missed it. It was a little pricey, so as far as I'm concerned wear it as long as you want!

Today was my turn. I had the office latest edition to the dental hygienist staff. Her name was Katie. She was adorable. She also had a great personality. I know this because she actually asked conversational questions rather than the standard "Did you have a good Christmas?" We watched "Ellen" (they have flat screen TV's placed on these arms -- kind of like the lights, so you can watch while lying on your back) and discussed the new season of "The Biggest Loser." She would remove the tools from my mouth when she asked me a question, so I didn't have to mutter dentist chair speak.

And, well, that was one of my clues. I suspect with all of my being that Katie graduated from dental hygienist school -- YESTERDAY!

Clue 1: Before I even sat in the chair she had me do a 360 degree mouth x-ray. She was "all-my-friends-from-sixth-grade-are-coming-over-for-a-sleepover" excited about using this technology. I'll admit it was fascinating, but still it was just an x-ray of my teeth. Only a newbie would be this excited about using new technology.

Clue 2: The reason she took the tools out of my mouth for me to speak is because she hasn't been doing this long enough to understand dentist chair speak.

Clue 3: This was the clincher. You know the hook-like thingy they scrape your teeth with? Yea, the one with the sharp point on the end. Every time she put that tool up next to my gums she would insert the sharp point INTO my gums and then pull it down across my tooth. Okay, now that you are cringing . . . note that I said EVERY time.
After the first 3 teeth, Katie says "Oh, it seems you gums are bleeding a little."
-- REALLY, I wonder why? --
After about 15 teeth, Katie says "Boy, your gums just like to bleed don't they."
-- Um, no they DON'T like to bleed! --

I never made a peep. Honestly, I felt a little sorry for her. We all have to learn somewhere, somehow, right? However, now I know why people don't like to go to the dentist -- cute, bubbly, dental hygienists named Katie!

Good news: No cavities!
Better news: I don't go back for six months! That gives Katie a while to practice!