Friday, October 12, 2007

Observations in The Ozarks

I have lived in the Ozarks all of my life. I am VERY comfortable with the fact that I do not meet a majority of stereotypes associated with hillbilly life.

Now, please understand that I'm not a cultured, gotta-have-my-Broadway-and-lattes kind of girl. God didn't make me that way. I guess you could consider me a redneck (Yes, there is a difference between a redneck and a hillbilly.). I enjoy deer hunting, fishing, NASCAR, riding 4-wheelers, the smells of dirt, dairy barns, and the lake. I also like to sew, quill, bake, shop, eat chocolate -- all the girl things.

I am obviously unique. However, some of my fellow Ozarkians will fit any vision you may have concocted to a "T". Let me give you some examples from a recent craft fair I attended.

Last Saturday my sister and I grabbed a friend a piece and headed of to a local craft fair we attend every year. There are always great sights to be seen.

We hadn't even been there five minutes and lo and behold if we did not run into some people form the town we grew up in.

Neither my sister or I live there anymore, but our parents do. It's rich with small town gossip and snootiness. If your last name isn't such and such, well forget about ever getting the time of day from half the town. I thought maybe I was just bitter from attending 13 years of school in the town. After I went on my way and started my grown up life I was sure I would have a more mature perspective on the whole hoop-ti-la. I gave them all the benefit of the doubt, until I wasn't invited to my 10 year H.S. reunion! Now, that just made me mad. I'm still a little bitter.

This could be why I did everything in my power to avoid having to converse with the people from our hometown. The group consisted of Aunt, Mom and Daughter. It's important to know that I went to school (K-12th grade) with daughter. Until Saturday, I had not seen her since our Graduation day. We were friends in school. Everyone was friends, kind of. There were only 36 people in my graduating class. I told you it was a small town.

My sister was quite helpful in helping me avoid the hometown peeps. Now, some of Sis's comments were not so Christ-like.

"Oh, yeah, I saw Daughter's Mom in Sam's the other day. She was wearing that same silly fanny-pack! I'm so glad our Mom is not the only weird person out there!"

"Daughter's hair is the exact same as when you guys were in high school!"

Now she was right about the hair thing. It was the same shoulder-length spiral perm with chia pet bangs Daughter had when we were in Junior High. It looked like she had some method of freeze drying her hair every night to preserve the 80/90's look. I didn't really think any less of her for not changing her hair. It just truly amazed me.

Ozarkers (aka Hillbillies) seem to be like this though. It seems like every time a tornado comes through it freezes people into the style of the given decade. If you've been here, I know you've seen people like this. They're everywhere. Especially craft fairs.

I also noticed that her face was quite wrinkled. YIKES! Quick a mirror. Do I have wrinkles?
Let me just tell you that it is extremely frightening to run into someone you grew up with and realize they look old. I'm not old. I don't know what happened to her. Maybe all the strife involved in keeping her hair preserved.

The real reason we were there -- the crafts. There are lots of handmade wooden toys at the craft fair. The really nice kind that don't need a "for ages ?+" label or a recall notice. The kind that a grandpa makes. The kind you can pass down from generation to generation. There are homemade soaps and lotions, jams and jellies, quilts and floral arrangements. Booths manned by SAHM's and retired couples.

One particular retired couple, bless their hearts had a booth with lots of homemade items. She had sewn lots of things. He had contributed his own handiwork. They obviously have chosen to spend their twilight years traveling the craft fair circuit together.

This would be where the Hillbilly craftiness comes in. The old man had made some reindeer. They could be purchased for $2. They were made out of red Solo cups. Two cups glued end-to-end for each leg, again for the body, and one cup for the neck and one cup for the head. Wow! $2. Solo cups.

Not to be outdone the old lady had purchased several types of children's themed material and machine stitched kid size quilts. One particular material was originally intended to be one of those quilted books. A large printed square at the corner of the quilt included a verse on the material the went something like "This Book blah, blah, blah. . ." Well, if obviously wasn't a book so the little old lady had used her trusty Sharpie marker to cross out "book" on the material and write (again, with her bold black Sharpie) "quilt" above it. Again, wow!

So tomorrow, I'm off to another Hillbilly fest, uh, um . . . I mean craft fair.

Don't back out on me now, Sister JB! The fun has yet to begin!

Thursday, October 11, 2007

TT -- A Hunk of Burning Love

Today, I'm throwing back to Halloween 2 years ago.
A-Man was two. My mom and I made his Elvis costume. This is his best costume to date. I don't know if I'll ever be able to top it. The guitar was made from a tissue box, paper towel roll, gelatin box, some brads and rubber bands!

Go retro with Pinks and Blues Girls Throwback Thursday!

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

WW-Doggie Costumes

I cannot take credit for this photo. I cannot give credit for this photo. It arrived in an e-mail from a friend.

If I had a dog, this is probably how I would dress it for Halloween or when company came over. Then the dog would bite me.

Probably a good thing I don't have a dog.

More Wordless Wednesday at:

5 Minutes for Mom
Wordless Wednesday

Thursday, October 4, 2007

TT-Daddy's Little Girl

I was desperately needing a Throwback Thursday. There are currently a lot of grown up things going on in my life and a trip down memory lane was just what I needed to remind myself of what life is all about. . . Sweet Memories!

The first 4 and 1/2 years of my life I was the only princess in the kingdom. Those years were a special time. I was Gramma's Little Girl, Papa's Little Girl, Mommy's Little Girl, Daddy's Little Girl. And, yes, that probably equals spoiled.

My Daddy and I have always had a special bond. We're very much alike, the list is endless. So, this one is for you Daddy! I love you!

Monday, October 1, 2007

Breast Cancer Awareness Month

Cancer in general is devastating. It's hard to say one type is more difficult than another. Anyone who has dealt with cancer in any form has faced a life changing experience.

As you probably know, October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month. I hope all of you find your own way to show support for those who have been stricken with the disease and survivors alike.

With all of the respect in the world and my crazy sense of humor I would like to suggest the following website:

Save the Ta Ta's

P.S. For the record, my favorite is "My ta ta's could beat up your ta ta's!"

Lost and Found

Okay, so I work at a college newspaper. Some days it feels like a glorified babysitting job. Other days its a complete riot, like today!

A little background.
I supervise the advertising department. This semester we started offering classified advertising, FREE of charge to students, faculty and staff! Little did we know the fun and exciting things we would have the opportunity to advertise!

First free ad of the semester:
--For Sale, Precious Moments Collectibles,
because the HOT item on college campuses these days is who has the limited addition of the "You are my sunshine" figurine!

Ad that was canceled before it ran:
--Wanted to buy reasonably cheap, various sports memorabilia, hay, and laptop computer.
I am currently doing research to find the percentage of college students who have some extra bales of hay lying around.

Now this one an honest to goodness paid ad, from a professional business man.
--Worried about passing that test? Hypnosis works, guaranteed!
Where was he when I had college algebra?

Today's submission and my personal favorite so far:
Found, guinea pig near science building. If lost call XXX-XXXX.

Thank you Jesus, for humor on the job!